Relationships

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 5:59 pm

I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years (we do not talk about getting married)... Very Happy I could not imagine going through a break up especially right now when i have so much going on in my life. He is my best friend and helps me with every situation. If i didnt have him in my life i think i would be very upset, and i think it would show up in my work and my attitude. I dont have any great advise for anyone, because i havent experienced a break up in a long time. I would just say no matter how hard things get you have to move on. Hold your head up and do what matters most in your life (God, family, school, friends....)

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:00 pm

I agree that you should guard your heart but not to the point to where you are cold to everyone. You can still be a loving person but be safe about giving your heart away each time you meet someone.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:00 pm

A serious breakup could have a huge impact on your college life. It could be negative but it could also be positive in that the person you were with could have been holding you back from what you really want to do in your life.

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Re: Relationships

Post  johnfmichael on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:00 pm

KaitlinD wrote:I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years (we do not talk about getting married)... Very Happy I could not imagine going through a break up especially right now when i have so much going on in my life. He is my best friend and helps me with every situation. If i didnt have him in my life i think i would be very upset, and i think it would show up in my work and my attitude. I dont have any great advise for anyone, because i havent experienced a break up in a long time. I would just say no matter how hard things get you have to move on. Hold your head up and do what matters most in your life (God, family, school, friends....)

Sounds like a healthy relationships, so most likely things will be fine.

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Re: Relationships

Post  johnfmichael on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:02 pm

MalloryC wrote:A serious breakup could have a huge impact on your college life. It could be negative but it could also be positive in that the person you were with could have been holding you back from what you really want to do in your life.

Good point. Often breakups are debilitating, but they can also be liberating.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:02 pm

BrookeC wrote:I agree that you should guard your heart but not to the point to where you are cold to everyone. You can still be a loving person but be safe about giving your heart away each time you meet someone.

I agree. I didn't mean it like that. I think you should love everyone you come in contact with to your fullest. When I say guard your heart, I guess I mean your feelings. You can't take and make everything to be a life changing event. If it is, you'll know.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:02 pm

johnfmichael wrote:Here's Question #3:

3. The breakup of a romantic relationship can be very difficult. Everyone has experienced this at some point in their lives at varying degrees of intensity. What sort of effect can a breakup have on you as a college student? What advice would you give other students dealing with a breakup?


Breakups that are messy cause a lot of stress to a already stressful situation. Its hard to concentrate on school when ur always wondering if u couldve said something different or done something different then it couldve all turn out different. So my advice would be to always say how u feel and don't hold anything back so u won't regret the decision that u made.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:03 pm

I was in a very controlling relationship my SR. year of high school. I had been with him for about 2 years and i thought there was no way out. He took me away from my family, my friends, and had a say in every aspect of my life including collegel. I wanted to go somewhere away to college but by the time we had broken up it was too late. Luckily i still decided to go. Im glad i went through the break up this summer. I had wonderful friends who still loved me and family that helped a lot. but i still dont know that i would have been able to deal with college and everything being new plus going through that break up

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:03 pm

johnfmichael wrote:
MalloryC wrote:A serious breakup could have a huge impact on your college life. It could be negative but it could also be positive in that the person you were with could have been holding you back from what you really want to do in your life.

Good point. Often breakups are debilitating, but they can also be liberating.

I will admit that after I got over "mourning" the loss of my unhealthy relationship, I felt better than I had in years. Free at last.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:03 pm

Because of the choices i have made it has only made me stronger. My relationship with my son and my family has made me realize how important a college degree can be.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:04 pm

jaredr wrote:
BrookeC wrote:I agree that you should guard your heart but not to the point to where you are cold to everyone. You can still be a loving person but be safe about giving your heart away each time you meet someone.

I agree. I didn't mean it like that. I think you should love everyone you come in contact with to your fullest. When I say guard your heart, I guess I mean your feelings. You can't take and make everything to be a life changing event. If it is, you'll know.

I agree

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:04 pm

BrandyM wrote:
johnfmichael wrote:
MalloryC wrote:A serious breakup could have a huge impact on your college life. It could be negative but it could also be positive in that the person you were with could have been holding you back from what you really want to do in your life.

Good point. Often breakups are debilitating, but they can also be liberating.

I will admit that after I got over "mourning" the loss of my unhealthy relationship, I felt better than I had in years. Free at last.
Same here and then you look at the past and say what in the world was I thinking!! haha

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Question #4

Post  johnfmichael on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:05 pm

Good discussion so far. Okay, Question #4:

4. Today people can interact via face-to-face (FtF) communication and/or via online communication. Which do you prefer? Why? Do you think FtF is intrinsically better than online communication like MySpace, Facebook, etc. or is it the other way around? Why do you think so? What are your thoughts on developing relationships via FtF rather than online communication or vice-versa?

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:06 pm

AshleyWoo wrote:
BrandyM wrote:
johnfmichael wrote:
MalloryC wrote:A serious breakup could have a huge impact on your college life. It could be negative but it could also be positive in that the person you were with could have been holding you back from what you really want to do in your life.

Good point. Often breakups are debilitating, but they can also be liberating.

I will admit that after I got over "mourning" the loss of my unhealthy relationship, I felt better than I had in years. Free at last.
Same here and then you look at the past and say what in the world was I thinking!! haha

after you get throught the hard part you can look back and see what you dont want to go back to. It can help you decide what you want for later in life and really appreciate the good when it comes along

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:08 pm

BrookeC wrote:
jaredr wrote:
BrookeC wrote:I agree that you should guard your heart but not to the point to where you are cold to everyone. You can still be a loving person but be safe about giving your heart away each time you meet someone.

I agree. I didn't mean it like that. I think you should love everyone you come in contact with to your fullest. When I say guard your heart, I guess I mean your feelings. You can't take and make everything to be a life changing event. If it is, you'll know.

I agree

How can u really guard your feelings? When u enter a relationship you are always takin a risk of getting hurt, esp a serious one.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:09 pm

Face to Face communication is definately better because you can actually see the person and thier emotions and expressions. Sometimes through the computer or text messages i cant tell whether the person is upset or happy, etc.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:09 pm

Face to face is definitely better than online communication when getting to know someone. When you're around them, you can see who they really are, and not what they just say that they are. And even though face to face can be just as misleading as being online, it's better to actually be around the person.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:09 pm

I guess the better one would be which ever people are more real in. Sometimes it seems like you get a much more real person online, in text, or on the phone, but other times, that intimate face to face talk can't be beaten.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:09 pm

It depends on who im communicating with.. If we were talking about this online discussion and our class, i would say that i like being on here better than in class. In class discussions that are face to face, i dont ever want to offend someone or argue with someone or even hurt someones feelings. If im on here I feel like i can say what i want. Its like the computer gives you courage that you wouldnt have when you are face to face. In high school i remember anytime a girl wanted to "chew" another girl out, she would always do it on the computer or in text messages. Being face to face brings out the coward in most of us.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:10 pm

johnfmichael wrote:Good discussion so far. Okay, Question #4:

4. Today people can interact via face-to-face (FtF) communication and/or via online communication. Which do you prefer? Why? Do you think FtF is intrinsically better than online communication like MySpace, Facebook, etc. or is it the other way around? Why do you think so? What are your thoughts on developing relationships via FtF rather than online communication or vice-versa?
Well FtF might be better cause what if the person you are talking to on Myspace isn't really who you think they are and might be some pervert! All though its a more comfortable environment when you can just talk to each other online

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:10 pm

Sometimes I prefer face to face - like in personal relationships (unless, of course, there is not an option - such as family that lives far away). For most "professional" communications, I prefer written communications such as email (but not MySpace or Facebook).

I would think that it that it would be hard to have a romantic personal relationship online. Someone could be totally deceptive and you would never know because you would not be able to "read" their body language.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:11 pm

Face to face can be more personal. Its easier to keep up with more people at once on the internet. Like my close friend moved to cali. its easier for me to text her or message her on facebook or something like that then for both of us to meet or talk on the phone. we are both so busy. but i think we should all make time to talk face to face to people.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:11 pm

on the other hand, if it is a positive conversation, i want it to take place face to face Very Happy

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Re: Relationships

Post  johnfmichael on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:12 pm

KaitlinD wrote:It depends on who im communicating with.. If we were talking about this online discussion and our class, i would say that i like being on here better than in class. In class discussions that are face to face, i dont ever want to offend someone or argue with someone or even hurt someones feelings. If im on here I feel like i can say what i want. Its like the computer gives you courage that you wouldnt have when you are face to face. In high school i remember anytime a girl wanted to "chew" another girl out, she would always do it on the computer or in text messages. Being face to face brings out the coward in most of us.

Yes there is a feeling of anonymity in online communication that can have both positive and negative effects.

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Re: Relationships

Post  Guest on Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:12 pm

johnfmichael wrote:
KaitlinD wrote:It depends on who im communicating with.. If we were talking about this online discussion and our class, i would say that i like being on here better than in class. In class discussions that are face to face, i dont ever want to offend someone or argue with someone or even hurt someones feelings. If im on here I feel like i can say what i want. Its like the computer gives you courage that you wouldnt have when you are face to face. In high school i remember anytime a girl wanted to "chew" another girl out, she would always do it on the computer or in text messages. Being face to face brings out the coward in most of us.

Yes there is a feeling of anonymity in online communication that can have both positive and negative effects.

online gives this odd boost of confidence, but I don't think it will ever beat the face to face talk.

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Re: Relationships

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